Emotional Education: The 5 Fundamental Pillars That Help.
Parenting and love, two words that travel the world by the hand.
The upbringing and construction of the family are two of the most beautiful and magical challenges that life can present to us. Why?
Because from the first moment children become the greatest treasure of parents, in their place in the world, their home, their corner, their everything.
Raising and loving are two verbs that travel the world by hand because the vast majority of parents, from the most profound and most unconditional affection, share their thoughts and emotions with their children, rediscover life, explore the world and help evolve the family as a core of noble values.
The right thing to do then is to emphasize that parenting is not easy. Even though the adventure of parenting brings people closer to the real world and sets their feet on the ground, actually educating in love and positive values are one of the colossal tasks out there.
“You’ll teach to fly, but they won’t fly your flight. You’ll teach them to dream, but they won’t dream your dream. You’ll teach them how to live, but they won’t live your life. However… on every flight, in every life, in every dream, the footprint of the taught path will always endure.” -Mother Teresa.
The family, the cradle of emotional education
Our lights and shadows are projected individually into the standard conditions that lead to our development.
Therefore, Kaye’s expression is correct when he states that “the child is placed by the family system in which he is born in the position of apprentice of the system; that is why we can ask ourselves what these characteristics of family systems will make it easier or difficult for the apprentice to become an adult capable of evolving permanently or blind to this possibility are.”
Parenting is often inherent in restlessness and the need to learn how to perform our roles in the best possible way.
This implies that we must enhance our communicative and personal skills about our roles as parents and individuals.
This confluence, therefore, requires us to approach emotional education from the very first moment.
Emotional education begins from birth, as the way parents vehiculate their affection, expectations and beliefs about the child is decisive for the child’s development. Specifically, the first years of life are decisive for several reasons.
In the first two years of life, the most remarkable influence on a child corresponds to establishing a basic safety framework, which is finally transmitted through physical and affective contact with the child.
From the age of two, an essential aspect of emotional education becomes emotional education: language.
Its appearance and evolution allow words to be put into behaviours, ways of being, feeling and thinking. This milestone certainly sets up a before and after.
At this time, children become expert emotional explorers. They continuously seek their parents’ powers in approval mode, which makes them order, understand, predict and deal with the world and with themselves.
The 5 fundamental pillars of emotional education
To make a correct emotional investment of education and our children, we must address at least five fundamental pillars:
Accompaniment through words and deeds:
Communicating correctly, sincerely and emotionally with our family is one of the keys supports when it comes to sustaining good relationships with children, whether these children or are already on their way to adulthood. At this point, it is essential to be consistent and analyze our actions.
If we want to captivate children through emotions, we must be a reflection of an excellent emotional adjustment, which we will only achieve if we are clear about what emotions are healthy and what emotions are insane, always starting from the basis that they must be offered resources for good understanding and management.
Managing our emotions:
Being aware of our thoughts, creating as a family and properly managing tensions and stress are the foundations of emotional intelligence that sustains a healthy and happy family.
Serenity in communication:
The basis of family reconciliation is that trust and reconciliation allow us to recognize ourselves as a family within one’s diversity.
That is why we must strengthen our empathetic and interpersonal communicative skills, which will allow us to solve diverse problems and conflicts adequately.
Encourage concern to know the universe of emotions: exploration and curiosity are the foundation of all good education. Likely, through exploration, we reinforce the pillars that sustain a mind free of prejudice and stereotypes.
Respect and emotional validation:
We must be clear that, as Carl R. Rogers wrote in his book “The Process of Becoming a Person, ” we don’t know the tremendous pressure we put on the people we want to have the same feelings as we do.
So often, with the way we talk and act, it seems that we say, “if you want me to love you, you must feel just like me.
If I feel that your behaviour is bad, you must feel the same way; if I think a certain goal is desirable, you must feel the same way.”
There are no perfect parents, but there are many ways to be good parents.
Being the perfect parents 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, is a titanic task. That is why in this sense, we must be complete and admit that not everything is lovely and that there is no ideal prototype by which we can guide ourselves.
Thus, from direct or indirect experience, we all know that parents’ critical thing is not that they are people with imperfections and insecurities.
As such, they give children the possibility to live in a balanced, enriching and emotionally intelligent world.
There is no magic formula, but an ingredient shares all the sound educational principles: infinite love.
This feeling is the one that brings together the parenting work every day and ensures that parents can offer the best version of themselves as educators.